<--->


Two friends, recently reconnected after over ten years apart, begin an online correspondence: one in California (Farmer), the other (Johnson, a Seattle native) in Budapest, Hungary. Shared interests lead to an ad-hoc collaborative writing project involving constraint-based texts on the subjects of baseball, expatriate-ism, and the recent rise of the Tea Party in the US. Excerpts below.


Johnson:

Hi Steve,

Anagramania. I've been having way too much fun with this: http://wordsmith.org/anagram/

I just type in baseball names and piss myself laughing.

Anyway, thought you'd enjoy the fruits of this morning's labor (see below).

Regards,
Dave Otto

 

1989 Oakland Athletics Anagram Sonnet

spiny hilltop dorm vistas

endorsed haven trench bestiary beach-plank linens

a red egg-cart

repave dark honker residency

chew blob check into yurt

no gene lens

fancy rad loners insert java (ugh, barn blend)

'j' is micro

aw, witless mega-like log! seedy screen link eyeball bin

grim wreck, ma . . . . 'twas averted

***

mike romeo, a rosy sultan

o.j.'s case (once) [o.j.'s sex-life]

punk relic agony mutt bonds turd

yon shares sail upon oil
 

tony phillips storm davis dave henderson terry steinbach lance blankenship greg cadaret dave parker rickey henderson bob welch rick honeycutt

gene nelson carney lansford stan javier glenn hubbard jim corsi walt weiss mike gallego dennis eckersley billy beane mark mcgwire dave stewart

***

mike moore tony larussa jose canseco felix jose eric plunk matt young todd burnsron hassey luis polonia

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Farmer:

f f f fabulous

great idea!!

ah the "punk relic agony" of the coliseum.

do continue-- its crying out to be chapbook.

it's almost conceptualist!

yrs,

Stream Fever

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Johnson:

Glad u like, Mr. Fever!

How awesome is it that the bespectacled, inauspiciously named Eric Plunk = Punk Relic?

Billy Beane's 'Eyeball Bin' is also primo.

I've worked on a couple more, but they're at home (I'm in office): 1994's strike-stricken Montreal Expos (Freddie Benavides = Freebase Dividend) somewhat after George Oppen; and the 116-win 2001 M's, very much after Catullus (the names just lent themselves to ribald, swashbuckling gayness).

Traveling to Ukraine next week for some conference but will try in near future to put some more together. As a chapbook idea, I'd say it has at least some AAA potential. Just need to fine-tune the fundamentals....

Rgds,

John A. Sonnet

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Farmer:

we used to call him ker-plunk

when the homers kept comin

(off of him).....

i.e.,  put eric on the mound?

ker-plunk.

 

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Johnson:

2001 Seattle Mariners Anagram Poem

      
                            after Catullus

Iíll lie upon a bald devil or harder tush

a sea loner, a mock ermine– a rakish oak, Suzi!

(ouch, I irk Suzi)

Enter,
boob! –

– or duel John Dawn-Loins! (ham ala John!)

 

Aim? Mere joy –

Greased-up yard-fag cider!

Tampon milk!

Anal trim!

Ardent rim gaze

Capering slosh-bottom trek

I rejoin pole gorillaís uncle

 

Hey, jar nub!

'A jet van, sir?'

I jog, sauna ape!

'Enjoy elf ferns?'

Putt, Balboa!

 

***

 

Marl Creek, mom. . . .

tarn loch morn frankly ran in

 

 

(And another, tho not perfectly...)

 

1994 Montreal Expos Anagram Poem

                                  
after George Oppen

 

doff lyric fold

raw lark lyre

jeremiad qua loss

 

handle newt jot

topaz reminder

then, kill hen-fed veined seabird

snaking mile

whorled inlet

ferret-rich land

weird turkey rook

a mouse silo

a mandril lying


oh, tomtit cyst

her few jays flee

they brunch off jarís reef, yes


lo, azure fir

a jealous profile

barren, yes


air smog squirms

beige thaw

edgier hail


weird color, the prism

encode hubris

be sternly new


key: Clif(ford) Floyd Larry Walker Mel(quiades) Rojas John Wetteland Pedro Martinez Ken(neth) Hill Freddie Benavides Mike Lansing Moises Alou Randy Milligan Tim(othy) Scott Butch Henry Jeff(rey) Fassero Lou Frazier Sean Berry Marquis Grissom Gil Heredia Wil Cordero Tim Spehr Lenny Webster

And yet another (working on this year's)

1969 New York Mets

            his dogleg


doggerel art durable horns

polka redone


fli-by bebop

a jocular kid    tornado rally

 

emote image  johnís jeep console

a morph-joint inflects

 

wry garden tragedy

trashy mask    candle world

 

same voter      or many jokers

broody wackos

 

sad lecher a warty regent

dwarf-man wrecking


new cars jammed

a nylon ran no, a cockle

 

   lend cannon-din novel

belles know too amiss

 

        we sail ye dry duff

grasp a rod


key: Gerald Grote Ed Kranepool Ken Boswell Bud Harrelson Wayne Garrett Cleon Jones Tommie Agee Rocky SwobodaArt Shamsky Al Weis Rod Gaspar Donn Alvin Clendenon Bobby Pfeil John Clifton Martin Ed Charles Amos Otis Duffy Dyer Tom Seaver Jerry Koosman Gary Edward Gentry Don Cardwell James McAndrew Nolan Ryan Frank Edwin McGraw Cal Koonce Ronald Taylor Jack DiLauro 

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Farmer:

fab stuff. !      i feel thee i may "grasp a rod".

really like the "after catullus " or "Oppen" -- are you plugging the anagram words into an Oppen form, for instance, or is there a mash of vocabularies? just curious.

hmm, you got me thinkin. maybe we can keep exchanging anagram poems or something. you stay on the baseball track, and i'll start something else.

then we could try a constrained set perhaps-- like you have to use some of my lists and i have to mash with yours. what do you think?

yours,

Structuralpus



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Johnson:

This sounds fab, Steve. A bit spastic at work today so I'll give a closer reading to what it's about when I've got some time. This evening, hopefully after the li'l camper's put to bed.

It's funny to think that at home I still have a letter (a written one!) you sent to me in NY. There were really cool comments in that: "I don't read Charles Olson to learn about Indians...I'm interested in his art forms" springs immediately to mind.

BTW, have you ever read George Bowering's 'Baseball' poem? Pretty cool. I have a copy of the diamond-shaped book.

As for your formal question: after picking the first four or five names that struck me as especially rich, they seemed to suggest 'something', and then as I proceeded I tried to find something that could fit somehow... though it's obviously quite impossible to retain any semblance of purity. Then the 'theme' itself seemed to suggest a 'voice'. I think any future efforts I might try to find ways to break up the anagrams or use fewer names to create something a little less --seemingly-- forced. In the examples I've sent you I include every player on the roster who had at least 25 ABs and pitched 20 innings!

It would be nice to go for something that actually captures the spirit of the team itself. Or maybe other tactics will spring to mind.

Hey, it must be weird to watch the other city by the bay celebrate a WS win. I'm actually pretty happy for the Jints. In a way, things worked out very nicely; the Rangers eliminated the Yanks, and then graciously went away. I saw your friend's comment on FB about the nauseating 7th inning stretch display. More like 7th inning retch. Couldn't watch anything here but I was at least spared having to see that. Still like Cliff Lee tho, until he signs with NY.

Until the next wave of inspiration....

-Dave Heaverlo


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Farmer:

Hey Heaverlo,

Taking inspiration and general technique from you, and using the fabulous anagram server, I'm going to build a series of pieces commemorating the vomitous rise of the tea party. Here are my first two :

 

MEGATEA

       

beer, hon.

be her on.

be her john on job, hen

her on.  christine

child intern in-

clined, hole snort that

a child intones

as loner torched

linen, loins.

be here

none a bod grid

or bad dig. for

the voter, bone

her, john.

 

 

Rules: Comprised 190 proof from anagrams derived from the following terms: john boehner + rabid dog + christine odonnell + expatriot


........................................

APAULED

 

the east seat

eats slop

at an ale

post, a

pale sot.

 

 

a lard

pun at a pot

sale a late

ape lost. what

 

 

lapse in clothed

rape the

state la poets

pesto in

opal-- canes

a clonal awol

 

 

also salt --that

lopes a patriot's

rotate trait

trope and

drab id

pretax. let

the asps in

the spa.

 

Rules: Comprised 180 proof from anagrams derived from the following terms: rand paul + apostle + rabid dog + expatriot + two antonyms of the term "constraint" (aggression + allowance)



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Johnson:

Steve,

10x the poet you are to me: I say this not as empty praise, but in recognizing that you have certainly spent (at least) 10x more the hours committed to the craft than I have. But I have the advantage of living abroad: hence much less Tea Party irritation.

I thought, since I'm in a creative mood tonight and not a critical one, that I'd send something of a riposte, under the collective title: SPHLINTER GRUPPE, four pomes having to do with some of the media components of the TP phenomenon. I have, of course, used the anagram machine.

This collection aspires to 200 proof, which provides some evidence of the need for good distillation.

 

rupert murdoch


turd murderer procured!

 

tru cop

thrum

thru ochre mud

 

porch rump

 

 

fair and balanced

 fan-banded racial

fad in candelabra

 

acrid bandana elf

a bland, naif cadre

 

 

taking back our country

 

gunky intro:

 

 tuck a cutback or a cobra

trunk

 

 uncork a tricky gunboat

rink

 

 a tobacco guy

nuking troy

 

 

creeping socialism

 

icicles as ring poem

a piercing solecism

 

pigs on a semicircle

spin as licorice gems

 

 

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Farmer:

 

SCORE,  very glad we are doing this.

200 proof much harder to do !


I think I'll return with anagrams of baseball trades. my first will be:

rajai davis for trystan magnuson & daniel farquhar


the first line that comes up I like?:     a variant  fart  rids joys


anagram server is the arm of god

- scrum mutton

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Johnson:

Steve,

The anagram server is having a bit of arm trouble tonight. Slow delivery. Forcing me to adjust my stance, but not my swing.

Tonight's theme: Baseball team-name poems, with division standings in 2010 dictating line order, and the top team taking the (ahem) title. I think this remains very close to 200 proof, tho I may have dropped an 's' here and there (i.e. team name in singular).

Big problem, however, is: anagram god hates Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim as a name (and don't we all?). So I'm going to use whichever scramble of Los Angeles, Anaheim or California I like best.

Some better than others, of course, but this is a pretty strong lineup, dressed for tonightís contest in 11-pt Goudy Old Style.

Sincerely,

Nate



Scansion: as in "Crafting", G

paranoid's edges

social rock rodeo

re-sold loss engaged

armband as zodiac ikon



Intrinsic Dance

ain't sun oils radical?


'we be lukewarm, sire

toasts! honours!'


go scuba chic

tis truth, bagpipers



A Pallid, Hellish Hippie

bar-vat sealant

fills random air


my town reeks

now, ninth as nostalgia



Stranger's Axe

talk to enchiladas. . .

a fine cranial slog

. . . let's arm trainees



Sea Tints Minnows

ditto register

weigh toxic chaos


vend in dalliances

croaky-ass litany



Pay a Stab Army

knew sky one year

(sexton broods)

a turbojet loony


liberals riot or moo



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Farmer:

quite the line-up, indeed. and very dressy.

my de-codes of your team name anagrams:

   1. the san franciscos

   2. the cincinattis

   3. the philadelphias

   4. the texases

   5. the minnesotas

   6. the tampa bays

lemme know if i missed any. remarkable how the anagrams generated by chance can be so poignant to the topic at hand. e.g.: "tampa bay rays" yielding your title "pay a stab army" (by the way, wow) -- in reference no doubt to the inevitable fire-sale antics of low budget teams like the Rays and 'my' A's.

since no wild-card team made it to the playoffs, here's one made from anagrams of the phrase "wild card teams" + some words derived from the letters within the phrase itself:

 

A CRAWLED MIDST

 

crated law

dims

tea's raw-

est weld-carded

micra

twaddlers

amd crawdad

melts

as lewd. wed ta

a disc steward

are dreams armed

wild. wed ta a

tamed medal

wrist, later

made

weird malts.

mild. mitred slaw

aced, its deism

dimed a

wilted race, a dra-

matic card

team-mates dread

as a AAA

teat; redact.

 

 

whew. barely got thru that one-- the form's constraints almost ate me. 200 proof though-- but that only after i relaxed/expanded/cheated the rules to include the phrase's single letter recombinations.

keeping honest to the constraints makes me wonder if i would succumb to torture.

so, still owe you the rajai trade piece and more tea parts, it's coming soon-- hopefully more by next weekend.

so, i wanted to ask you basically whats up. but i cant find your fbook profile -- did you drop off?

i have a few expatriate questions i've been wanting to ask you.

 

- Boat At Drip

or

- Brad Tap I To

(anagrams of 'bad patriot' )

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Farmer:

Natage,

back from bball detour, a return to the tea party theme with this one. planning to do three more of these (already written the titles-- woohoo). taking five vacation days off Jan 3-7, so will have the time to complete them.

This one's comprised 200 proof from anagrams derived from the following terms: marco rubio + pat toomey + not a witch

 

as such, behold the mighty . . . .

 

STRUCTURALPUS

 

our cobra boar

coos

a curio bra

or to carob

our macro coma

boor, eat my op

tome, a tempo to-

mato motto, petty

mote nacho toy typo

or not. our mob

bio, our mar bur ro oar

roam won a ton. yo

meat team, ape my tame

pet moat: hate. or I aim

at you. or to oat me, type no

-no atop a pat hot

act, eat my

canto w/ canto

thaw tonic: twit, intact

at tea. cat wit + tan

chow = cow hat.

pay em to me.

eat ma chino

winch, ma watt

twitch into

a aitch town-- Nth

it, wot can you chit .

 

 

own one now.

 

 

chant town watch.

 

. . . . .

yours,

Bad Lineal Rile
A Deniable Rill
Liable Liar Den
Ballerina Idle
Aerial Bill End, Braille And Lei

(anagrams of "liberal denial")

 

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Johnson:

Steve,

Godlike!

Merry Christmas!! I will be at you with stuff. As you might imagine, I am harried with family obligations, most of them pleasurable.

My best to your family, and special hugs to Kim and Adam.

You're a real pal, pal.

-N


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Farmer:

okay, finally made time for two more. derived, respectively, from anagrams of:

   1. karl rove aqua buddha + tanning bed or tanning product

   2. meg whitman + carly fiorina + nikki haley + ron johnson + jim demint + mike lee

 

i think they go lie this:

 

THE GETTING

 

red hour: a

boulevard

hard aloud

had a durable kola

blur and quark

bod. grind porn in

to a vodka quarrel

a broad ad hulk, a

debt nag antic.

old rod bode a dude

droning pact, a louvred

grin. intend an in.

brave vaquero-- verbal

have bud.

bra barrel (bar)

and baroque

overhaul. dark

rave canting a

dub pond.

 

 

 

CARLYMEG

 

lo, an icon

corral.

 

clarify iron a mind jet.

cry a coin a liar a royal

a magnet when

nag met whim.

 

kinky leaky ail akin

to finical Calif

roar. coy/cloy

on oral loan

or frolic canary

racial for fry oil.

 

ironic fray or

clarion fairy?

carrion fir afar, icily.

 

 

hamming wet man wig.

 

 

khaki hanky, like i like ink.

 

 

a me thing. math might thin.

. . . .

bests,

Sir Milton:
http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-504083_162-20028937-504083.html

 

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Johnson:

Hey Steve,

Very nice. 'Cry a coin a liar a royal' ... I've been meaning to ask how you incorporate the multiple (+) names. Do you pick parts from each or try part of one with part of another? ...as there's a limit to how long the input can be.

Just wonderin'....

Your anagrammings are more fragmented and exploratory. I'm more working with single names/phrases and picking the one I like best. Works, but I'm not really taking advantage of more progressively innovative input strategies (how's that for corporate-speak?).

I feel that a Milton Bradley epiphany might be on the cards this week...

Happy Monday!

-Rick Monday

 


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Farmer:

hey monday--

nice corp-speak. 

re: your wonderin', i enter the names/phrases one at a time, pick the best anagrams from each list, and harvest from there. i select across all lists, which still keeps it 200 proof, but provides a lot more range. staying 200 proof is difficult, as you know. scrabble-like, slot-machine-like, i always hope to end up with bridging data, like articles (the, a in, on, or, of, etc), which expands the combinative possibilities. (note that some pieces have these articles, and others don't.)

as you might have surmised in your own practice, in actuality my approach is less innovative than desperate.

btw, we need milton back here in oakland, to go with our stellar pitching. we can handle his tantrums. we'll use our mellow cali clubhouse and powerful west coast herbs, accordingly.

btw, mlb tv's larry bowa (yes, former mlb manager) just picked the a's to win the west, as do i.

top to bottom, best pitching in the majors, and yes i (dare) include philly in that assessment.

and, equally brashly, here are my final tea p contributions:

FLAGNABBIT

loner hour

rehung lo. actress

scare. hunger glen.

mashers as harem

shame wreaths reach the

heart haterism.

gone role, run long.

i i i. him.

warmer births. bar

shrew. log cases react.

hater wreath. as waters

brr him. as waters brr a

meat stir brew, rites

wash what swath what thaw

withers writ arms, this

shit we hits we ram

crass, teach this.

their cashier

thesis, their orchestra

sachets. the sit merits

a loner log. the sit is so

others crash. the longer-

est gun charters

u. go on, search his rot.

(Comprised 200 proof from anagrams derived from the following terms: birther swarm + loughner + the crosshairs )



JOURNALISMO (Addendum)

demanded duty

maddened id in ad

mind.  man an ID.


add dented

mutiny.  tended.

dented.  minted


tune / muted ditty

tin menu-- nutty!


band dun did

add tiny

dynamited   h  o  m  b  r  e .


nudity / mud entity

an unattended indent.



(Comprised 200 proof from anagrams derived from the following terms: glenn preck + addin dumb + dentity addendum )

nuff said,

ale nest
salt nee
sale net
Stan Lee



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Johnson:

Steve.

Felt inspired tonight to be 'impressed' by another page of Glowball:

http://www.spdbooks.org/Producte/9780964734272/glowball.aspx

See below.

Also, a few 'variable foot' anagram poems featuring exerpts from Obama's Arizona speech.

 

Cheers,

Darold Knowles

 

Parts/Din riff no. 2


preview privileged and then briefly brilliantine


a view grabs oceans, absorbs possibility

a barge kills the. . . prime want


to be made out of anything me

back into desperately


seriocomic contempt for the viewer

scream at form / a special, primal scream

for you, the champion viewer


why not have a piece of theory

"heavy twenty-yr-olds"

or twenty "grl somethings"


the great things wear out

the great thing is: we are out


(of) glassy ammunition

glean that act (ed life of) Oedipus that -- that

engaging wot cannot

fit diaspora, or a grocer's gesture


gawker / immediate ur-machine

cacking ceramic

decorous


fit any or not


-----------



scripture tells us

 

scripture tells us

evil in the world

terrible things happen

 

 

tut, slurs pericles

while not drivel --

he's a-tippling, brethren

 

 

none of us can know

with any certainty

what thoughts lurked

 

 

ocean of unknowns

anarchy yet, nitwit

hulk/thug:  stow hatred

 

 

quitessentially american

congress on your corner

what is best in us

 

 

centenarianís smiley quilt

Cocoon A's gunnery errors

wit uses absinth

 

 

heroism is here

poses a challenge

raises a question of what

 

 

homier heiress

shellacs peonage

squirt a 'woof' anesthesia

 

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Farmer:

 

nate.

 

"impressioned" also with yours.  smokin hot shit.

we shld release a parts/din single featuring DJ Na-Jo remixes.

 

and the barack speech riffs--

"absinth"ous ghost meanings emanating from state-speak.

at the awfulest of times, in tragedy (cf Gifford shooting). weighted.

 

and the darold knowles reference: the fact that long before we met in seattle and came to be friends, your early baseball games as a kid were here in oakland watching the A's. weird serendipitousness. fab.

 

yrs,

Ho-Jo

http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/j/johnsho01.shtml

 
looking back at his stats-- roids? guess we'll never know.

"let em enroid, and bring us profits."

 

signed,

Glib Used

(anagram of bud selig, guiltiest pig a' th trough)


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Johnson:

 

Hi Steve,

I just did a quick appraisal of the proposed Figgins/Kouzmanoff swap....which I didn't know about.

Figgins: All tools considered, a major league 'average' player, with a couple of anomaly seasons thrown in -- a couple very good and a couple of stinkers, last year included. Safeco's not a very hitter-friendly park. One season excepted, he doesn't hit for high average (around .260), but he does draw lots of walks, so his OBP is actually quite good (about .350 career avg). He's a very good baserunner so a lot of those walks become doubles, which is a good thing because he has nada power. In the field, he's below average at 2nd base but well above average at 3rd. He's 32, so he's probably approaching the down-side of his career, but he might be capable of 2-3 surprisingly productive years. He also carries a pretty heavy contract, a downside for Oakland financially if they make the swap.

Kouzmanoff: Not quite Figgins at 3b but still an above-average glove at that position, so nothing to worry about there. Figgins would provide some 2b capability if needed; that's it. KK is career a little below average where all tools are concerned, but he's only 28 and approaching peak performance years (typically 28-32), so he might tear the cover off the ball in seasons to come. He hits for about the same average as Figgins, but draws far too few walks, so his OBP is pretty low, which I think is his only significant drawback. Lacking Figgins' speed, he hits for good power, a definite plus.

All things considered, I don't think it's a trade that would be beneficial for Oakland, especially if KK can sharpen his batting eye and draw more walks. Plus, he's four years younger and doesn't cost as much.

Over and out,

Scout

 

 

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Farmer:

thnx scout.

i've seen figgins play a lot, and his mariner self seems a mere shadow of his lil red angel face.

i totally agree; i want them to keep KK and see how he does-- last year was his first in the AL i think, and NL --> AL's  a tough transition for both pitchers and hitters-- so I think he'll produce better offense this year.

go kooz! go zook!

sf

 

 

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Johnson:

I think part of the problem is that the M's have two leadoff hitters: Figgins and Ichiro. But, this being the case, I think it makes far more sense to bat Figgins first, as he draws lots of walks and strikes out a lot. With Ichiro being a much better contact hitter with far fewer strikeouts (and walks) he should hit second. Problem is: Ichiro won't (as in refuses to) hit second. I think this was a troublesome setup for Figgins, who had to switch from being a get-on-base guy to a move-him-over guy. After he made some adjustments he hit much better in the second half of the season. But they should really flip-flop those guys in the order. Then the M's just have to sort out spots 3 through 8!

And how sick is Philly's starting 4 ?!

-Paul Lindblad

 

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Farmer:

grt analysis of the one and two holes, lindblad. makes sense.

phillies staff? they're sick indeed. the best money can buy. but what else can i say except that oakland's staff is deeper and younger. best ERA in the AL last year, which means best ERA in the
majors, no? with a better bullpen-- by a lot.

and carter and taylor down below, and godzilla de rbi.

and now in gold unis (alternate jerseys, wow.)

 

if if if if we stay healthy, well . . . .

 

there's nothin to fear, bitches,: u n d e r d o g i s h e r e

 

sfarms

 

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Johnson:

Love the canary yellow alts! I'd be really impressed if they someday re-dared to wear the 68-71 all-yellow vest/pants combo:

http://exhibits.baseballhalloffame.org/dressed_to_the_nines/uniforms.asp?city=Oakland&league=AL&sort=year&increment=9&pos=1

Didn't know the A's had such kick-ass pitching last year. Yes, best in AL, but four teams in NL lower: Atlanta, San Diego, St Louis and the Jints (3.38!).

Another reason to keep KK: Oaksters were last in the AL in roundtrippers last year (not that you care), except for Seattle, which doesn't count because of their truly historic offensive ineptitude. Speaking of which, Pittsburgh's team defense rating last year was a staggering -105, meaning that opponents should have scored 105 FEWER runs over the course of the season if the Pirates had LEAGUE AVERAGE defense. Awesome!

Reminiscing about the terrible A's of the late '70s...how about Rob Picciolo? Check out his BB total vs plate appearances.

http://www.baseball-reference.com/players/p/picciro01.shtml

Later,

I. M. A. Geek

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Farmer:

they actually did wear those full yellow top yellow pants '74 unis on 70's Retro Night at the sold-out Coliseum-- pretty sure the highest attendance date last season.  I was there, as were many bad afro wigs and ganja clouds. i got a bright yellow free giveaway jersey (pull-over v-neck style) for getting there early, mailed it up to adam. but will somehow find the bux for two of these new ones (the real field version), one for me and one for him.

i don't count NL ERAs as equal to AL ERAs (because of the DH, and because pitchers can't run either). for me, a 3.30 NL ERA is a 4.00 AL ERA. so I maintain the A's had the best 2010 ERA, period. ha!

by the way, on mlb TV last week, Larry Bowa chose the A's to win the AL West hands-down.  perhaps i already mentioned this. perhaps it is feeling like spring optimist time.

wow to pittsburgh defense. wow.

re picciolo, holy shit, he prolly could have doubled his OBP by just closing his eyes and farting for four pitches on half of his total at-bats!

Laters,

Will.I.Am.A.Pud

 

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Johnson:

Steve-O,

Having just spent some quality time on Baseball Reference dot com, I've completed a groundbreaking comparative analysis of league ERAs since the DH was adopted in '73 (see attachment). Very interesting! AL league ERAs are higher every year except '74, when they were identical. Discrepancy peaked in '96 with a run differential of .78. However, there hasn't been as much discrepancy as you might expect since 2000. And just to piss you off, I've compared OAK-SF 2010 ERAs to the year differential, suggesting that SF's staff was maybe the Major's best, even accounting for differential. So THERE!

Meanwhile, have a gander at the Billy Ball A's of 1980 page....and check out the number of COMPLETE GAMES these mofos had! Even the closer, Bob 'Arsenic & Old' Lacey, had one.

http://www.baseball-reference.com/teams/OAK/1980.shtml

And for good measure, here's a picture of Rob Picciolo displaying the kind of plate discipline that earned him such an anemic career OBP.

http://as.ebid.net/for-sale/1978-topps-528-rob-picciolo-oakland-a-s-31859870.htm#pic

Arriba!

Color Biopic



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Farmer:

killjoy.

i'm skeptical, even in the face of stats.

;-)

 

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Johnson:

Yes, facts are stupid things...

But anyway, I forgot to adjust for style points.

:0---<



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Johnson:

Hi Steve,

Stayed up tonight for one last contribution to our thing. A single sentence from Gopal Balakrishnan in an analysis of a Fredric Jameson's latest work provided the inspiration. (Editor's Note: See the image at the bottom of this correspondence.)

Five poems, anagrammed from a paragraph I came across today that explains a great deal about everything today except baseball. All poem titles are anagrams (and themes) drawn from the paragraph author's name.

-Jim Roland / John A. Sonnet

 
 
 

a.k.a. Shaping All Born

 

hot. . . amid intend

fry-lid campus

tagged at once

 

the firm italic voices sit

'mind be deed'

 

fun-form rector

mislays epics

taser'd in ice

 

a fondue theorist

emeritus hop

non-racial data, yes

 

theology motif

print halo

 

iffy debut

 

 

boos

 

 

 

a.k.a. Hogan's Pill Barn

 

'it increased'

theme ref: comfort urn

 

dined / bed (pit)

 

suicidal calm /  tofu threnodies

                  & hindi totem

 

i "so mrs fictive"

(omit hefty 'seismic palsy' logo)

 

forlorn hippy hat

engaged to cat

canaries only

 

be gone, bodysuit!

 

a mute radiates

 

 

a.k.a. Lob 'Sharing' Plan

 

enacted iris ---------

foci striveism

plastic aim lucid

 

my ghetto folio

noel! : fib sync aria

 

(booty feud / bed act into...

 

tee-suit armada

 

'tango edge' / the men died)

 

fly north, pop hair!

slay epic-isms!

 

did anthem

 

cure from front

hoist unto    

freed

 

 

 

 

a.k.a. Lob 'Plan Garnish'

 

hi, diamond tent!

                  he tended; me bid --

                                    nearly casino

 

uh, riot (hoot!) softened!

                  got my file

                                    simply sea [sic]

 

pip holy horn fart!

                  turn from force

                                    sidecar nite

 

if vim, to crises

                  octane gadget

                                    he tended me

 

bid team stadia

                  rue illicit U.S. madcap

                                    so die off, tubby

 

 

 

 

a.k.a. Hang Parson Billy



our hot, infested gloomy

royal missile space

aerated autism

mended debt    

 

he, its dire acne.

 

 

evicti or

miss if

obesity

dub off

 

 

tulip cicada slimes

 

thief to canine

 

turf conformer

 

frothy porn phial

 

hit dog cage at ten

 

mention dad

 


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Farmer:

That's one hot anagram source-- a night well spent! this stuff is enchanted/bejeweled-- love how you navigate the forced sets of words/phrases and skirt toward/away from meaning only to _______ ; how the strategies ma- and dema- terialize, how the materiality of the material becomes object-like, kind of blunt and un-negotiable, cornered for a bit (rather feels like daily life, no?)-- constrictive writing where we have to think on three feet, and you so do, compadre, with your:

c o l (o r) c o d e d (e x) p a t (r i o t) i s m
 

bottles up/down,

sfarmses
 

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Johnson:

Hi Steve,

Thanks for the feedback. I had a mad burst of energy last night after putting Jojo to bed.

Just one addendum: I haven't really said anything specific re: the Tea Party as such. Part of the reason is that great distance affords me the luxury of being able to ignore these morons. I don't have to put up with what might be for US residents a possibly ubiquitous (to say nothing of frightening) presence.

From my side of the pond, I see the 'movement' as a largely media-generated phenomenon, and not a popular, spontaneous uprising (as were the anti-war gatherings worldwide in 2003 that went largely unreported). I think the media contingent was motivated to push our rather Reagan-besotted president even further to the right -- and there's no denying success on that front. But the craziest thing about the Tea Party is it's cockeyed mistranslation of much otherwise legitimate 'anger'. It's something like reading an otherwise good book upside down. I mean: 'Obama is a socialist'. How can one even have sentence two of that particular 'national conversation'. I suppose you just have to walk away and hope to not get shot in the back.

But, more significantly from my point of view, is that the radical nutcase right-wing carnival barkers (Limbaugh, Beck, Coulter, O'Reilly, Malkin, etc. etc.) function as Empire's Useful Idiots. They help to ensure that the only political entity of any substance in the US in opposition to the Republican Party can continually tack to the right and still seem sane by comparison. And this is borne out in nearly all conversations I have with most of my friends here and family back home -- nearly all of them self-described liberals. Even as the US continues to pursue morally bankrupt and wholly destructive domestic and international policies for the benefit of the world's uber-rich, the response to any pointed criticism is essentially the same: "But just look at the alternative!"

At least there's one stock-in-trade imperative that people can't beat me with: "If you don't like it here, why don't you just leave!?"

Anyway, just wanted to blow off that particular pot of steam. But don't get me wrong: Palin, Michele Bachmann, Rick Santorum .... all these people. Fuck 'em!

This lil' project has been a delight.

 

-Abner Doubleday

 

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Farmer:

well said. "the alternative" always put on hold in favor of the big as if: as if global capitalism must go un-or-under-regulated, allowed its freedom,
its play (lo the "humanism" of this premise), as if it were a little child, as if the little shit's rapacious tendencies need to roar on unchecked, or nothing. as if there's actually no alternative, and no shadow (accountability); as if reason is not an option. as if knee-jerk ha8ing & violence is for grown-ups, professionals, kids, and thugs alike. and many of us are only one or a half generation away from this stuff in our own families. kim maintains the root of the amped-up red state hatred is still really racism, and fears for obama's life. i can't say i disagree. in our small household, gotta say, we be lookin to europe in envy. as we watch this empire degrade, a dream of expatriotism seems the best we can get for now.

as friends in the UK might say (dourly), "brilliant".

yours under the spectacle,

sf